I went to a party last night and all my pals from McDonald Land were there. Ronald, Cheese burglar, Grimace, all those French-Fry Things that no one can understand, the Big Mac police guy, the whole gang...
Well, everything was going just great when, all of a sudden, things turned ugly. Mayor McCheese showed up, stoned out of his big old cheeseburger head. The mayor's drug use had long been rumored among those in the know in McDonald Land, but nobody could have envisioned something like this; this ugly, this perverse... There was the mayor, beloved by hamburger laymen, leaning heavily on a pair of Cherry-Pie bimbos, stumbling towards the punch bowl.
"Give me Godamn Drink!" he slurred, "Let's get this party Going!" His words filled a stunned silence, created by his flamboyant entrance. Can't a guy get some decent hors d' oeuvres around here?!" The mayor was gesticulating wildly, brushing bits of shredded lettuce from his head. "Oh Jesus... I'm coming apart again" he muttered, grabbing some lettuce from an hors d' oeuvres tray and stuffing it between the two giant buns that comprised his skull. "Holy Shit! I'm getting sober!" he roared, suddenly wide awake, "Let's party!"
Mayor McCheese reached down and grabbed one of the French Fry Goblin waiters. "It's time for shots!" he yelled, "Let's see who can hang with Mayor McCheese!" He lifted the waiter up to eye level, approximately seven and a half feet off the ground, and shook it violently. "Hey, French Fry Fuck! Set
us up, man! Tequila shots for everyone, and two for Ronald!"
