Shaq: Shaquille O'Neal

NBA Center or Sumo Wrestler


    So I was innocently sitting there watching an NBA game on television the other day, and since NBC seems to think that the NBA has only a handful of teams, and only shows these teams when they play the Lakers, I was once again subjected to watching the hoops team from La-La Land. Okay, that’s alright I understand that LA is the second leading TV market and that the NBA is desperately trying to fill the Jordan void - so I start to tune in, and watch what now passes for basketball. But then I heard it. The announcer repeated the most patently absurd comment I've ever heard, and since I didn't have my VCR running I will have to paraphrase it, it went something like this:
Shaq said that if he got all the calls when he was fouled that he would score 60 points a game.
What! First off if the ref's called all the fouls that occurred within the rules of basketball Shaquille would foul out the first six times he lowers his shoulder and goes to the basket - Which would all occur in the first half of each game. I think it's bizarre that a players patented/goto move is an obvious offensive foul. I looked it up and it is still a foul, so I thought that maybe it's like traveling or the 3 second rules which in the NBA are just overlooked, but apon further examination it seems this Jim Brown like move is called in the NBA - just not on Shaq.
 
This begs the question of why does the league let Shaquille get away with it? Is it that Shaq is bigger than the game, are the powers that be so desperate for the next superstar that they will allow the game to be perverted into some type of full contact, human crash up derby? What about the ref's? Why won't they call the foul? Word from up high? I don't know.
 
Secondly Shaq shuffles his feet every third time he gets the ball in the post, if all the calls were made he would get tagged for steps 20 times a game and would never even get a shot off. This is not exclusive to Shaq of course, the NBA has allowed creative traveling for years.
 
Thirdly even if the lower your shoulder and knock over the defender so you can get close enough to make a shot move was allowed, and steps were continued to be allowed, we all know that there is not enough time in any pro sports game for Shaq to make enough free throws to amass 60.
 
To be fair, by all accounts Shaquille is a nice enough guy, and donates time and money to various charities. I don't know him, have never met him and wish him no ill will. But I do think that his comment about fouls being called was not only ironic, but the most absurd thing I've heard in the last 10 years that didn't come out of Bill Clinton's mouth.
 

 
© IM Slack - 1999.



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